FEAR and Stories We Tell

e are all great story tellers - the only difference is most of us tell great stories to ourselves, while some of us can articulate it to the world.

Every so often, when things get challenging, our brain creates vivid scenarios of what could go wrong! How not getting the promotion right now or making a mistake on the coveted project is going to be the end of our professional lives, or how speaking up on stage could be hara-kiri.

We live our fears, which in turn doesn't let us live us focus on what we ought to be doing. Unable to do what we ought to do amplifies the anxiety further, which in turn embellishes the doomsday stories in our head.

In times like these, 3 things have helped me.

1. Reminding myself of what FEAR stands for - “False Expectations Appearing Real”
2. Most often FEAR triggers off physiologically; for instance before a big presentation you may feel anxiety, sweaty palms, breathlessness . Focusing on deep breaths has a calming physiological influence, which helps calms our mind.
3. We were born with only 2 fears - fear of loud noises and fear of falling; since every other fear is learnt, based on our life experiences, it means it can be unlearnt as well. Visualizing overcoming our fears works well to get started.